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Super Shovel0

Forget your Swiss Army Knife.  This shovel is all that you’ll ever need to do . . .  well, pretty much anything.

Holy crap!  I wonder if it’ll tuck me into bed and give me sweet, gentle kisses at night.

This is the kind of tool that guys drool over – a manly multi-tasker that can dismantle a deer or take out a tank.

Seriously, this thing is sort of the evil God of Multi-Tools.  Not only can you kill somebody with it, but you can also surgically extract their fillings, chop them up, make a coffin, and dig a deep hole to bury them in.

Try that with a Swiss Army Knife.  McGuyver might be able to pull it off, but I suspect that would be far beyond your average man.

And no, I’m not advocating any of those activities.  And yes, I’m twisted—but that’s why I get paid the moderate bucks.

Don’t worry.  They keep me securely locked up and feed me only pretzels slid under the cell door to maintain my malnutrition.  On a good day, I get a gummy bear.  ONE gummy bear.  The pineapple one.

Where to get one?  No idea. 

Have a nice weekend. 

by John Barker

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